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Hello fellow collegues...happy to have you here. I welcome and appreciate all feedback so please feel free to be open and honest with your constructive criticism. I look forward to getting to know all of you better through your writing...cheers!


Monday, March 19, 2012

Classmate Response 1, Week 9

Improving Wk 9
I am about to try the 6 word stories... I don't know how well they are, but that is why it is an improv post.

1. Silence watches the slowly sinking red van.
2. The hands withered under constant pressure.
3. Cold eyes glazes over the crash.
My response to Morgan:
I really like the first one becasue of the imagery and the questions the sentence raises. Silence is a great word to use here because you wonder why it is so quiet after a wreck. Is it a wreck? Maybe its a van beng carried away by a flood and eveyone else is too busy trying to stay alive to notice..or there is so much going on that these individual detaisl can only be noticed by the silence. Why red? Is there anyone inside?
I think this is what a 6 word story aims to achieve -the ability for the reader to vsualize something as well as the ability to raise questions enough to keep the reader occupied long after the 6 words have been read.
In the second one I like the use of the word "withered" I tried doing to 6 word story as well and realized that a)its hard and b) you have to be veryprecise in the words that you choose.
In the third one, I like the cold eyes. But if were talking cars, I like the first one better.

Great attempt!

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